Moving forward...

 and major step back for the country but that's another topic entirely.

Finally connected with Dr. Mohan (surgeon) and basically reiterated that we're all clear everywhere else and he's put a note in to Dr. Camberos my previous reconstruction surgeon because he's the one that's actually going to open me up. For some reason. I should have gotten clarification about that because I had the oncology surgeon I thought last time and then Camberous doing the reconstruction but my brain may be misremembering.

So now have to wait for Camberos to call and set up an appointment with him. Still have two other scans to go one on my head and one for my thyroid, primary doctor appointment in two weeks... and .... still no progress on getting may car fixed.

Amber took us to the store yesterday because we thought we'd be getting ss money then but it came in today. She didn't tell us she had $100 to let us buy what we needed until we got there. I love my daughter, love all my kids but .... she was pushing all my buttons in the store like a caffeinated six year old and Jon was loving every minute. 

Anyway we have some basics to last for another couple of weeks since we have plenty of meat for a while and another friend may be bringing by some veggies and fruits and a few other things tomorrow or Thursday. We have good friends and family in our lives that have the means to help us out and I am eternally grateful for that.

Jon and I, without a car have been walking almost 2/3 of a mile to CVS and back again the last few days to get water jugs filled and a few other things. So we're getting some exercise at least. We needed some things from Target and decided to bus it down the road and then had lunch at Jersey Mike's before heading back home. Jon remembered he needed lip balm so the stop was right there and I forgot I needed large bandages for the 'open wound' on my boob. Dr Mohan said to definitely keep it covered and monitor if there are any changes to it. I forgot to pick up more of the  larger bandages I was using because the regular size bandaids were irritating the edges of it. Not going to take a picture and show you, that's TMI and not necessary. It's about the size of a nickle I think though so it's fairly large but I'm not sure if  it's getting better or worse. Will hoof to CVS again tomorrow and see if they have the right size  I need. 

Other than that, we have ice cream in various forms, sodas, water, coffee and sundry meats, bread and a treat of whole lightly salted cashews because we could. We bought sufficient water that if we get another triple deal from Food 4 Less we're set for water for the month and then get more sodas, we should be good. It saved us some money for sure which it a good thing always.

First tomato of the season and a finished pair of socks.There's another tomato almost ready and some squash coming on. Yay! The socks were such a bear to do and if they had been just about a half inch bigger they'd be perfect. If anyone has long narrow feet please let me know. I'm already working on another pair, the white rainbow speckle, 'sheepicorn' socks are on indefinite hold until I can get a new set of needles for them. I might spare a few dollars to get some but will see how the budget settles out this month. As usual. The SDGE bill is looking like it'll be over $100 for this month and I already paid $110 for the medical bills. With the surgery coming up, that's going to be another bill for next month. 

I wish I could easily consolidate or reduce storage cost. That would save us soooo much each month! Now without a car, it's even more out of possibility and I will not abandon either one. There's too much in mine at least that my kids would want to save and some of it is Jon's as well so it's something we have to set aside one day a week maybe when we can to go out and try to consolidate more. 

Like I've said before, if we had a place with a garage or internal storage, we'd be saving money but likely would be putting that money toward a mortgage or space rental or whatever but at least it would all be in one place. I haven't looked at any houses for sale or moving in months, it's pointless to do that right now especially with the economy and situation right now in the country.

Anyway... small personal victories keep us going.

Good news and clarification...

 Good news on two fronts; one, the neck biopsy is negative so we're in the clear for that and two, the genetic screening/testing also came back negative/clear for genetic markers. So yay for me! We only have my right boob to get taken care of. 

So right now trying to connect with my surgeon to discuss what's coming up next but left a message for him on the website saying that I got his phone message. He called me while I was in the shower. Go figure.

Clarification in regards to the current world/country status. I sound like I'm panicking but really am just very anxious and angry. I have heard from Jon many times that he had to learn to respond not react from his time being a beat cop in New York and then in the medical field. I have a hard time doing that and tend to fall back on the old adage "When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout." (which looking it up discovered it is attributed to the navy and  possibly The Caine Mutiny'.) 

After I panic and get all that out of my system I can look at the situation clearly and then formulate a plan.  When it's something that I am in control of to a degree (car is still sitting in it's parking spot because no one including myself has the money to get it towed somewhere and have it diagnosed).  More times than I can count I have had a logical plan or method of doing something and due to various circumstances and other people that are involved my suggestion is either ignored or I'm never given the opportunity to present it until after the fact. When it is now too late, damage is done or course can't be corrected.

I love Jon to the moon and back and would take a bullet for him as well but sometimes he is such a 'guy' that I can't get through to his brain. He needed to pick up his meds refill on all four things and we had just enough money to do that as well as having fare loaded on our transit cards. So he was going to just wait until the first and wouldn't tell me whether he had enough to last that far. SIGH I said, it's a chore but we can take the bus to the trolley and walk to the CVS and get your meds. He reluctantly agreed and we set off for our transit adventure. I ranted about it before and this seemed a fairly straightforward trip.

Well.... we got to the main transit center no problem, the original route had us stopping at a station almost a half mile from the main station. I thought that was rather odd and knew it was likely another stupid routing thing. So we got up to the station and I noticed one of the tracks was blocked, not noticing a third track that was for the short line we needed (again inserting trying not to 'bully' Jon about what we needed to do and feeling unaware of what was actually going on). So we both came to the conclusion that maybe the reason why the bus had us stop at the other station was because it doesn't go this far right now. It was a straight walk up the road (in full sun mind you but a nice breeze blowing) so we headed off... and then the trolley we needed pulled into the station. Jon said, let's just keep going. Wellllll neither of us have walked that much since Disneyland and Comicon so hips and feet were not happy at all and of course we were hot and sweaty but at least we got some exercise right?

Got to our destination no problem  got his meds (Thank you Medicare!) that only came to $8 and being exhausted and hot just came straight back home. Not until hours later did he mention that his meds have a sun exposure warning on them.

I was so angry with him but had to be calm and not even jokingly try to smack him due to his abuse history from his dad. I told him in a very firm voice that next time we have to go out in the sun for any length of time we bring an umbrella.  Luckily no adverse reactions other than a bit red on the back of his neck but still, that was a risk that he should not have taken. I've told him multiple times that if I say something to pay attention. He admits to being hard headed and not sounding weak when he's not feeling good. 

So no one ever listens to me or gives me a straight answer when I need one. It's one of the reasons why I am so angry at the current administration. I have a 'passionate dislike' for blatant liars and double talkers that can't answer a simple question with out giving an entire word salad explanation that never answers the question. Seriously. We haven't watched the news since January and only started recently due to the Middle East situation. The biggest problem is, feeling so helpless to do anything other than protest and spreading truth and facts. Feels like it's not enough when you want to go up to someone kick their ass and toss them into the ocean. 

So there, on topic, side topic and explanation. As soon as I get to chat with my surgeon I'll have more news about what's coming up next.

First and very short update....

 

 Good news, breast biopsy was benign,  they're still waiting for the lymph node results according to my surgeon. Once that comes in then they start setting a schedule and all that for surgery and treatment. I still have two more things which is the MRI of my brain and the follow up ultrasound of my thyroid. For now, no appointments until next month thankfully.

Still have to figure out the car and at this point need to get it somewhere to have it diagnosed and what the cost would be. If it's more than what anyone can handle then unfortunately it's better just to sell it even if it's a few hundred dollars. In the long run it saves me gas, insurance and registration money, short run it means depending on others and public transport for getting places. Like now.

I have been without a car before but I didn't have multiple doctor appointments and such just had work. So if it comes down to not having a car it's a bit more problematic right now. Treatments will be over in Kearney Mesa and doctors are in Grossmont. Not impossible just incredibly inconvenient and possibly expensive on an individual ride basis. I know I have two people that can be available but I feel guilty asking them for regular rides as it puts a dent in their budgets for gas. 

The world is going to hell in a handbasket with the main perpetrator thinking thatnothing is wrong and everything is good. This is the sort of situation where it can go two ways, first way is the heroic sniper/band of mercenaries take out the person or world war three starts and we're all screwed. Either way, the damage is done and it's going to literally be decades before our country is respected again. That is, if things continue going where the men behind the curtain want it to go.

Sorry to end on a sour note but that's one of the things on my mind right now. Oh and not having any caffeine in the house and no money get any. When I say no caffiene, Jon is out of coffee as well. We are doomed.

Biopsies done... relatively painless

 Weather is in the mild range lately. Compared to a week ago, this is bliss and also Happy Solstice (past, it was yesterday June 20). Very breezy today so that means a change in the weather is coming and weather app says it'll be warming up but not nearly as bad. 

Procedures went as painless as being poked and prodded can be at least. Amber gave us the ride and provided much laughter for Jon with her sassy attitude. I won't have any word from the doctor for another five or six days so it's another hurry up and wait. 

Not much else going on other than that, it was all very anticlimactic simply because it took so long. 

They did both in the same fell swoop, breast first then neck. The lymph node in question is right at the base of my neck on the left side nestled near the clavicle. Only mark to show for that is a tiny bruise and the breast location is under the nipple which has a clear 'skin tape' (best I can call it because I don't remember what she called it) that is so thin I can't even feel it. No bandage just the tape that will fall off on it's own apparently. 

I was supposed to wear the stretch bandage with an ice pack for 24 hours but the 'ace' extra wide bandage had rolled completely down by the time I got home. Took it off and got my rice pack out of the freezer and put that in my bra. Barely even sore there and my neck feels like I slept on it wrong but it's fading. The ache is actually behind my neck and up the muscle toward my ear because I had to lay with my arm above my head for the duration of the breast biopsy which was about twenty minutes or so. I kept realizing I was tensing that muscle and relaxing it. Was wiggling my toes and trying to keep the muscles relaxed as much as possible in the areas. Kept trying to think of anything other than them sticking needles in me and taking samples. 

So right now I've got a mild headache due to world news, didn't sleep well last night and hope I can just collapse in bed tonight. Not much else to do. Never asked Amber about help with the car and she didn't offer, Haven't tried to go out and start it again but might do that tomorrow.

I'm just tired today.

Dr Visit done...

 Thanks to my friend Margaret for being my no cost taxi for this appointment and assistance picking up a few groceries on the way home. 

First round of genetic testing results came back normal/negative for any markers of breast cancer that would need to be told to kids/grandkids. Still waiting for the other one that may or may not cost extra money. And speaking of that somehow the billing for the ER visit as well as two ten dollar 'check in' copays is now in my files. That's $110 that I was not expecting. ER was $90 as I expected but checked the details and the two $10 charges are for my appointments tomorrow. Just as a note, my ER visit would have cost over $10,000 without insurance and my two procedures tomorrow would have been a combined $2100. So thank you Medicare! May it still be that well covered for the next year or three.

So that on top of car repairs... just never ends. As for the doctor visit, told her what was up other than was was in my chart that she had seen already. She ordered the brain MRI and that will be done sooner than later. She also decided to get my thyroid looked at with ultrasound as that is going to be a yearly thing and we are four months from that so she called it good and ordered it for next month. I told her I had to cancel my cataract surgery consult due to the other appointments and she said that they were hiring more ophthalmologists so it's possible a new appointment won't take so long. I told her it was going to likely have to wait anyway until everything else was dealt with.

A non spam number called sometime after I got home, but my phone was in my bag or on the bed and I was in the other room. My stupid phone .... had to turn down volume on the messages and then figure out what constituted the ring tone and messaging and so phone call ring tone is too quiet.... grrr.  I called the number back and it said something scheduling and an agent would be with me shortly so I hung up. Keyword was 'agent' which as far as I remember, Sharp would identify differently. If they call back tomorrow I'll pick it up and see if it's them or not. So many balls juggling in the air and me without a car still.

So that's it for this visit, will be sore in a couple places tomorrow so not sure how energetic I'll be in the evening. Both of them as far as I know are done with local anaesthetic and either ultrasound or other guidance for the biopsy.  Just ouchy time is all. Likely not going to be able to lift anything over ten pounds again since both breasts and neck involved in lifting.  I watered the garden yesterday so I'm good for another couple of days.

Oh and there's two active wildfires to the east of us, luckily the wind is blowing the other direction for now but I smelled the smoke from the smaller one when we got home. That one is closer but still not even close enough for an evacuation warning. 

That's all for today that I can remember, eyes are getting crossed and not focusing well. Didn't sleep good last night due to heat. 

Minor update...and rant

 Appointments have been rescheduled for both biopsies. The throat/lymph node and breast will be back to back so I don't have to travel as much. Got the call this morning from scheduling and then the notification that not one but two had been rescheduled.  I messaged Amber and another friend for possible ride and Amber says she can drive us as she doesn't have work on Friday, YAY!

I was all prepared for taking public transit there and back again if neither of them could help out. By the way, SD transit mapping is totally and completely idiotic. Seriously. I'm sure it's the same for other places as well but the choices were, taking the bus to the trolley and then taking the northbound trolley to Santee but getting off almost a mile from where we needed to be because there is only one stop between the two points. 

I think the light blue is an alternate bus/trolley route? but this route map is if I were taking it today. The orange and purple would be my best chance. Now, why today is different than Friday I don't know because that orange and purple is the most direct route. It's because the purple route is intermittent/local and only runs during certain times of the day. But here's the other kicker that just absolutely made my jaw drop at the way they plot routes.

End of purple route upper right, then walk two blocks, crossing the street then double back at the opposite crosswalk then down the middle of the road....bottom left is where the medical office is. It has me not even crossing the street at the corner, or taking the shortest distance, it goes into the parking lot where there is no entrance, circling the parking area and then going in the building from the backside. There is no entrance on the back side of the building. 

I know it's all based on whatever satellite gps/google maps information there is and I chose the building name not the actual address, but honestly.... we have phones smarter than this kind of thing. It bases your time on the travel by this kind of thing and I can guarantee you, I can cut an extra five to ten minutes off that path.

Anyway, appointments are set for the end of the week, I will be ouchie in two different spots but easily managed. Just no heavy lifting and all that I suspect so will make sure to have food prepped and ready the day before. 

Temperatures are into the Summer range now so we have the AC on today and had it on yesterday starting around noon and running until just after sunset. It's getting into the low to mid 90's which again is not comfortable, it's 89 right now at 3 pm and got up to 90 a little while ago. It won't cool down until just after sunset. It'll be gradually cooling back down to the 70's this weekend and am glad we didn't have this raging heat on Saturday, it was hot enough as it was.

We had a wonderful chef salad of sorts today, cooked shrimp, ham, boiled egg, cheese, lettuce tomato, cucumber and onion with home made thousand island dressing. Totally filling and totally tasty. Although I will use a sweet onion instead of the read next time.

Good news gone...

 Got up at 5 am today for my 7:40 check in at Santee radiology and my left breast biopsy.... got all our things together for the trip downtown for the No King protest/rally/march that starts at 10. 

Got in the car, turned on but only clicked..... clicking only. Lights are on but no engine start. 

This is bad, very bad, not good. Go back upstairs with all our things, and because it is before 8 am AND on a Saturday, all numbers are in weekend mode for contacting medical office. Quick search on the internet and car has a starter issue. Which is very expensive and which I have no money for.

Radiology did call me and I told them what happened.. quick consult off the phone for her and she called back saying I'll have to call the main radiology number to reschedule the appointment. She was very understanding and wished me luck. 

So, that brings us to trekking downtown which was not much different than if I had a car. We just had to hustle back downstairs and to the bus stop closest to us to get to the trolley station.

We wore our Star Wars accented overwear, I chose my vest because I knew, despite it being nippy and marine layer in the morning, it was going to be warm later. I almost lost three of my pins and finally took them all off and put them in my backpack I thought to bring instead of my plastic 'shopping' project bag.

The two block walk from the trolley station to the gathering point of the protest. From where this was taken, it is about a block to where that brown building is. There is a slow river of people coming from that cross street from another location and just before the tree on the right side is the corner we would turn at. It was packed... seriously. Not hundreds, not thousands, but almost 50, 000 from the count I saw for the 50501 group. More solid numbers will be uploaded over the next few days

The obligatory Handmaiden that seemed to be the only one but we didn't travel around much with the crowd. A lot of the signs were very creative and I had to get a picture of this one. 'No Empire' symbon on one side and the other you'll have to zoom in on but it is a Tesla 'AT-AT' from the Hoth battle in Empire Strikes Back being taken down by the snowspeeder rope. I  made a very crude sign but with the car problem and being in a rush never really got it on a stick but we had our small American flags.

I took more videos than still photos because the sound was chanting at one point a few times of different things, just crowd sounds and overall people were positive, very few rude ones that we could see, doggos of different kinds, little kids... all with the same mind of peaceful protesting and making our voices heard.

Jon is now napping because his claustrophobia was tested very hard on the trolley ride home. We felt part of something that was important but I realized that we were all there for the same reason. There was nothing and no body that seemed out of place. But again, we didn't mingle a whole lot and after being there for maybe an hour, we were ready to head home given the amount of travel time involved.